are fucking creepy.
It’s like, subculture-y people date other subculture-y people, sorry, but like I don’t spend this much time keeping my purple bangs purple and applying eyeliner to bang some dude in a polo shirt.
People who have an intense “look” go out with other people who have an intense “look”
Like a punk’ll date a goth, or a metalhead or whatever other sort of weird looking on purpose person, but like yeah, if you’re not into them because you have something in common it seems really fetishizing.
Forgive me but i dont really get the sentiment, it can’t be that bad you appreciate a quality without being a part of yourself. You’re not going to share everything 100 percent with your partner or at least most people don’t. What about ladies that want to date outside of there own group? You say its fetishizing but im not sure how its not just as fetishizing for for a goth to only want to seek out other goth, just for the looks alone. And what about the lady subculture types, that like specific qualities of how a guy dress, i can not count how often i have been told “When we look for a man we examine the state of his shoes” I think my problem with this post is that i feel its aimed to to make a statement against reducing women to just the clothes they were or the subculture they are apart of but it attempts to achieve this goal by reducing people to a subculture or the clothes they wear. I dont see how its so impossible for a person who is “normal” to not relate to there “insert subculture” partner, if anything its an opportunity for both people to learn something. Mutual attraction and respect and trust is all that i think should be a requirement to open the dating conversation or hook up conversation. So what if one person may like the others tattoos the other could just enjoy there partners jacket.
I said goths may date punks, metal heads, etc, but we don’t date polo shirt dudes, or at least very rarely, and dudes who wear polo shirts who specifically go after subcultural women are gross because it is fetishizing, like if he happens to meet a subcultural chick and they hit it off, fine, but if he’s like “oh I’ve always thought goth girls were sexy” or he’s jacking it to goth porn or whatever, it is fetishizing because it is a fetish. He’s reducing her to an archetype and not seeing her as a person. Like subculture is more than clothing, clothing is a marker but not the whole bit. We usually share musical, aesthetic, and other cultural tastes as well as values and attitudes.
“What about ladies who want to date outside their own group”
1. Subculture doesn’t refer to one lone subculture. There are many.
2. Generally subculture-y ladies are subculture-y because they’re not that into “normal” people, it’s on of the reasons we choose to exist in a subculture. I’m saying “normal” dudes chasing after chicks from a specific subculture when they’re not a member of that or any subculture is daft.
Like we wear the clothes we wear for a reason, clothes aren’t meaningless, they don’t exist in a vacuum.
Also do you see the number of women who commented on this post in agreement? That’s because we tend to be creeped out by these dudes. We date other subculture-y types because they see us as people, as individuals, not archetypes, not trophies.
Thoughts From The Peacock Angel 