inablackmirror:

whoremoantherapy:

thepeacockangel:

kittiecunt :

thepeacockangel :

kiara-petgirl:

kittiecunt :

I don’t think that we can effectively move forward in tackling issues of sexism, racism, sexuality based intolerances, ableism, and so on, while simultaneously claiming…

But…I think what the original argument was that BDSM practices come from traumas or power imbalances in the real world. Not that the people who are practicing it are necessarily imbalanced in their power differences in society (such as a cis man and a cis woman), but that in a perfect world, people would not become aroused by ‘kinky’ things (so to speak). This is an idea I’ve been pondering about myself. Even you admit that a lot of your kinks come from the ways your mother mistreated or oppressed you when you were young. So while it may not be right to condemn anyone for their ways of personally coping with their traumas, or call the coping mechanisms in of themselves unhealthy, could it not be true that bdsm would not arise in a perfectly healthy society?

Maybe, maybe not, but I think the person was saying that by practicing bdsm we reenforce these roles, I say we process their existence. Of course this also raises the question of how possible a perfectly healthy society, where no one ever does anything emotionally damaging to anyone else is. As well although I believe my kinks stem in part from my mother and being bullied, I may also be this way inherently and have looked for a narrative to make sense of myself, or I could have some natural inclination in that direction but life experience may have shaped the direction it took or any number of other possibilities, as much as I can speculate on the workings of my own psychology, I cannot with any certainty determine the validity of my theories. All I can say for certain is that a certain set of stimuli result in a big release of dopamine and other happy chemicals