People are always telling me “Madeira, you’re not much for travelling, are you?” and I always respond “Oh no I love to travel it’s just that no one seems to understand that a weekend away involves three suitcases, a hatbox, and then I have to pack my full skin care regimen, including my two separate humidifiers (one for during sleep, the other to bring around with me during the day), my special pillow cases, a shower head adapter in case the local water upsets my hair, a lighted magnifying mirror, at least three outfit changes per day, a formal gown in case I need it, my special light for if it’s winter and I get sad, three kinds of sunscreen for different situations, a full library of Marxist literature, a second back up hatbox, the 7 or more separate products involved in washing my hair…” ad infinitum