I feel weird cause IRL I don’t have many girl friends, most of my IRL friends are dudes… this has been true for most of my life. TBH I think it’s because I’m faaaairly gay and I tend to feel super awkward around straight women because I think I’m very aware of a lot of stereotypes about “predatory lesbians” and like had to be hyper aware of them during a lot of my formative years so I tend to avoid physical and/or emotional intimacy with straight women, but also my current relationship is straight passing and I feel kind of awkward in LGBTQ+ spaces a lot of the time (especially because like… IDK I sometimes feel like people assume I’m straight because of how I look… actually a lot of people assume I’m straight because of how I look.) and I dunno… I’m a feminist, I don’t think I’m dismissive of other women, I’ve definitely tended to have more “girl friends” when I’ve had girlfriends because it was easier to hang out with other WLW and not feel weird. Though also a lot of the time when I develop a close friendship with another woman it kinda turns into something romantic and I feel really weird and bad about that.
IDK I feel isolated and queer and like maybe I am a “predatory lesbian” because I can’t be emotionally close to other women my own age without catching feelings (which is additionally complicated by the fact that I am profoundly monogamous)