Me: Gets sad about a short story about a turtle I read four months ago.
Also me: LMAO stick ur dick in a jar of ghost peppers, you fucking losers.

If you can’t fuck your god are they even worth worshiping

…I just really like Barbra Streisand.

That’s all I wanted to say.

You know what I don’t like? Gibbons.

Nothing needs arms that fucking long.

Uh-uh, nope, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck that.

People who like supposedly actively support non-binary people

are like often super happy to mock gender variant people who don’t openly identify as nbs, people love to mock unusual looking folks and be like “Well if you just looked normal you could get a job” when it’s like them very clearly expressing some shit re: gender.

You shouldn’t need people to have the hall pass of an identity before you accept that they have reasons for looking the way they look.

Me as I spend way too much money on a fancy hotel to have sex in: NOTHING’S TOO GOOD FOR THE WORKING CLASS

I mean sure, the garden of Eden sounds good at first, you’ve got nudity, you’ve got a wide variety of fruit, but like… it’s not the fun kind of nudity so really what’s the point?

morticiabronte replied to your video “I have a really intense crush on this beauty guru (like an actual…”

OMG!!! I was JUST watching his q&a and thought: “he looks like Madeira’s type!”

…he is exactly my type lol

I have a really intense crush on this beauty guru (like an actual crush, not just I like his makeup)

(Source: https://www.youtube.com/)