thepeacockangel:

If the usual thing was for women to approach men,

cause like having the group more likely to be a potential physical threat do the approaching makes it way more likely that the interaction creeps out/scares the recipient than the reverse

And so het women would be happy because hey not getting perved on so much (actually for all women cause like if men aren’t approaching you, men aren’t approaching you regardless of sexuality) and not having to watch every interaction like a hawk for hints of flirtation, and het men would be happy because they’re not as worried about coming off as scumbags.

I mean like I can see how women might use “can he approach me in a non-creepy way” as a litmus test of whether a guy is creepy, but like if you can interact with a guy for awhile before you turn it into flirtation, you can probably gauge some of that and also like a lot of very bad dudes are capable of seeming like harmless puppy dogs on the approach.

Like I think just removing this one element even if you left the rest of toxic masculinity intact would make a world of difference.  Men not being the initiators in romantic and sexual relationships would mean women able to move through the world without constantly being tensed to fend shit off, and men’d be less nervous about receiving advances cause they live in that “not sexually threatened by women” bubble that most of them live in, so it’d cause a lot less anxiety for everyone involved, also het dudes would leave lesbians alone and I feel like unless you changed a lot of other shit het women wouldn’t be like pawing at gay dudes as much so it’d be a better system.