in terms of traditional (shitty) standards of attractiveness, and I still think those standards are toxic and shitty. 

I feel like it’s weird because society insists that people with pretty privilege are being conceited if we ever acknowledge that we’re privileged in that respect.  Like I sound like kind of a dickhead now even saying I am hot, right?  Like for acknowledging that A: These standards exist, and B: That I fit them.

Being “hot” isn’t something I’m all that proud of, like I’ll admit I feel very lucky to be “hot” considering all the ways society would punish me for not being “hot” if I weren’t.

Hotness is weird, like it’s a form of privilege we’re always obligated to assure people they have, which isn’t the case with other things.  Like no one is supposed to politely and reassuringly go around telling people “no, no you’re definitely a dude” to make people feel better, like if you’re doing that, you’re doing it to hurt someone (usually an AMAB trans person) as opposed to make them feel better.

But “no, no you’re really pretty” is something you’re supposed to say, and of course like there are people who I think are SUPER pretty who don’t meet society’s bullshit standards of beauty because beauty is subjective, but like does pretty mean what I think pretty is, or does pretty mean “fits within society’s idea of prettiness”?

But then also if we do fit society’s standard of prettiness we’re never supposed to acknowledge that we do.  Like a dude can acknowledge he fits society’s standards of dudeness and has privilege because of it without sounding like a dickhead.

IDK, maybe it’s an indicator of something about this system of power that one of the ways it maintains itself is by making sure the privileged don’t even acknowledge that they’re a part of the group that is privileged, let alone acknowledging that the group in question has privilege.